After ten days I’m starting to get a really cricked neck which I can only attribute to all the bowing.

I have become a victim of JBS or Japanese Bowing Syndrome. I’m formally appealing to the Japanese authorities to set up nationwide centres and a fund to assist all western tourists, whose neck and back bowing muscles are not as highly developed as those of the Japanese to help ease the suffering. Please give generously.

Every time I have ever travelled, and I’m lucky enough to say it’s been many times, I’ve always come home realising that you never use half of what you pack.

We both agreed on this and decided to test this theory for Japan. We both literally just packed one side of our suitcases.

It didn’t work-we could have halved it again and still had enough.

Having said that, Brigitte has three daughters, the same number of son-in-laws and six grandchildren and, despite my insistence that a pair of chopsticks each was a brilliant space-saving yet authentic gift, she didn’t take my advice. We may need to buy another suitcase today as ours have now reached bursting point.

Osaka is just a short fifteen-minute hop on the Shinkansen (bullet train). We were supposed to take our suitcases with us to Osaka today and then use the excellent Japanese luggage forwarding system to teleport it from there to Tokyo airport.

However, Brigitte has used all the available space rendering our suitcases useless, sonthere seemed no point schlepping them around with us. Therefore, we have sent them straight on to our Tokyo airport hotel where we will meet them in five days; just before we fly home. Hopefully.

I’m sure they will be there when we arrive, but I still find it difficult to trust public transport services. Maybe the UK’s delivery services are not a good benchmark to use.

Every hotel has toiletries and toothbrushes and most other necessities so we just stuffed a few day’s clothes into our rucksacks and set off. We are now officially back-packers!

True to form we went into the hotel, dumped out small bags (which had grown in number due to shopping whilst in transit) and went to explore.

Osaka has a great vibe. It seems young and vibrant, noisy and colourful. A different feel entirely to the more conservative and relaxed Kyoto.

Lunch of Gyozo (Japanese dumplings) was followed by a visit to Osaka castle.

The Japanese, like many other peoples who live in typhoon, tsunami and earthquake zones have traditionally constructed their buildings out of wood.

I can only assume that, for the rich building castles, it’s a resources issue – ie no local stone – and for the poor, a cost issue. Otherwise it’s a very shortsighted decision. If you cook by fire or light by flame, then at some point something will cause your building to burn down.

It has resulted in many older buildings having been destroyed and, what early wars or natural disasters didn’t demolish, the Americans incendiary bombed in WW2.

Consequently, nearly all of the historic castles, temples and shrines have been reconstructed in the last 100 years. In fact, when you look at old Tokyo what you’re really looking at is a carefully reconstructed 20th century replica of itself.

The magnificent Osaka Castle is a prime example. Originally built in 1570, destroyed by war, rebuilt in 1583, destroyed again in battle in 1615 and rebuilt in the 1620’s. In 1665 the main tower was struck by lightning and burnt down. Repeat a few times until 1931, when whoever was paying for all the rebuilds must’ve had a eureka moment – use stone! It has subsequently survived nearly 100 years with the added benefit of decent wiring and plumbing, a lift and Japanese toilets!

Few people realise that the one-man-band originated in Japan, as did the didgeridoo.

We visited the castle on this completely ridiculous train.

Ridiculous not, as you’re assuming, because it looks like it’s for kids which, weirdly it isn’t, but because it was entirely suspension-less.

I was looking at my phone, clinging on to the train armrest for dear life with my teeth being smashed together in my mouth. I assumed the driver was being a lunatic but, when I looked up, we were travelling at less than walking pace. Old ladies were overtaking us! No idea why.

Need the toilet? Got a small child? Don’t know how to manage? Simple, just slot him or her into the baby holster..,,

Osaka is known Japan’s kitchen and famous for some of the best street food in the world so tonight we’re doing a guided fooodie tour…

It’s going to be a late finish so, as they say in the movies….

To be continued……..

18:50 – 15th May – Osaka